Embracing Exercise In Your 30's and 40's

Kaamna Bhojwani- Sexuality Expert
4 min readDec 26, 2020

It’s resolution time again. Will yours stick this time?

Let’s face it, exercise is just not that fun. It has a gazzilion benefits of course, but in the moment, it hurts like a bitch. So if it’s not something that’s jammed into your daily routine with no exit options, chances are your body will throw up more excuses than anti-vaxxers at a Trump rally. It’s a global pandemic, I’m busy, I’m tired, I don’t have the right shoes, equipment, $120 Lululemon dry fit, wind-resistant, sustainably grown, emotionally supportive parka.

So on and so fucked.

There is a school of thought that says that our bodies are really not designed to be moving at intense paces in short bursts of time. It’s compelling, certainly. Hunter gatherers had physical activity built into their daily lives and were much less disease-ridden than we are. But then again, no one thought we’d be sitting in front of square boxes for hours on end ordering DoorDash all day either. Desperate times, desperate measures.

Hitting the gym wasn’t really a thing for me until I hit graduate school. I had a hot boyfriend who thought it was sexy that I could hold a plank longer than he could. Win-win. Before this convoluted rewards system my exercise regime was primarily maniacal dancing at nightclubs and showing off my killer rajakapotasana at parties. Lucky for me, I was in my early 20’s and still malleable enough to integrate a new, sticky habit.

If you’ve come this far in this article, I’m assuming you understand the benefits of exercise and are looking for practical ways to commit to a routine that’s not a total drag. Bravo. It’s a worthy first step.

I offer these tips to you as someone who is obsessive about getting in five days of exercise a week. My mind and body are on board, hell, they practically beg for it. Here’s how I made exercise a non-negotiable part of my life:

Check your vitals before starting anything new and vigorous. Not something I would say to a 20 year old but let’s face it — in our thirties and forties wear and tear starts to reveal itself and you want to make sure you’re not stressing a part of your system that can’t take it. For instance, if you have a weak heart you will likely not be able to do a lot of intense cardio. No matter, there are plenty of other options but it’s good information to have.

What are your goals? Are you looking to drop some pounds? Tone up some jiggly bits? Relieve stress? Many workouts check more than one box but narrowing down a goal or two will make sure you meet your requirements faster.

What do you enjoy? If you’re an outdoorsy person, you can hike, bike, run, play a sport. If you like to move, dance, martial arts are examples of things you can do. It doesn’t have to be such a struggle. Capitalize on things your body already knows and enjoys. There are more creative options than you can think of. Just make sure to incorporate some diversity in your regime.

What drives you? Would you do well with a workout buddy? What about some friendly competition like Peloton that lets you track your progress against other people? Or if you like community, you can join a fitness class online or offline. Some of my best friends I made through my dance and yoga classes.

Is money a factor? I’ve found over years that investing in a good trainer can set you up with a great foundation. For one thing, it takes care of the accountability piece. No self-respecting trainer is going to let you slack off on their watch. The only person I’ve ever been afraid of is Evelina, my ass-kicking Latvian trainer who also happens to be a professional body builder. Trainers can also help you be more efficient and effective in your workout. Many also combine lifestyle and nutrition counseling which is really the right approach. Nothing happens in isolation, especially rock hard glutes.

Like all things in life, the secret to winning the struggle against exercise inertia (ex-ertia) is to know thyself. You will ultimately run out of excuses and may even begin to enjoy it (gasp!). Material goods will only take. you so far — incorporating exercise into your daily routine will be the gift that keeps on giving. And rock hard glutes are a nice perk too.

Related reading:

Learning to Love Your Aging Body

Fitness Basics You Should Know By Now

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Kaamna Bhojwani- Sexuality Expert

Studied sex, spirituality and psychology at Columbia University. Host of KaamnaLive (Insta/YT). Connect with me: https://linktr.ee/kaamnalive